My Husband!

Now the time has come to tell you about my husband! His name is Ramon and as of July 30, 2008 we will be married for 14 years. I consider that an amazing gift in and of itself. How anyone could put up with me for that long......he deserves sainthood. Not that I'm all that bad, but I take everything out on him that I can't take out on anyone else. He gets me at the end of my rope most of the time. For that, I repent, he should get the best of me all the time. He deserves that. I am thankful that he's stuck with me through that.
What attracted me to him was his genuine-ness. (Besides the fact that he is TALL, DARK and HANDSOME!) He was not putting on aires for me, trying to impress me, etc.. in fact we were pretty much just friends for a long time. He was the same when he was around his guy friends as he was with me by ourselves, as he was with a group of people out in public. He had nothing to hide and nothing to lose by just being himself. He didn't let everyone in, though, and guarded his heart, but when we did declare our "love" for one another, that was it for both of us. He was all mine and I was all his. There was no one else for me. He was always open and honest and we shared everything.
Since he was/is so genuine, I trust him completely. I trust him so much that if someone were to come to me and say, "your husband made a pass at me" I would let them know that THEY need to repent for lying. I trust him, and he has proved himself over and over to be trustworthy. He has never violated that trust and often protects that trust vehemently by putting in place guards of protection. Like for instance, when we were youth pastors, he would never ride in a car alone with a teen girl, or be in a room alone with a teen girl and even today, if he takes a babysitter home, we always ask the girl's parent's permission before and then he has maybe only done that 2 or 3 times, ever.
This is something I do not take for granted. His life is an open book to me, I could look at his email if I wanted, I could read anything he gets in the mail and know that he is not doing something that he shouldn't do. Not that I have the need to do that, either. He even closed down his myspace because of the scantily clad cartoon ladies (and airbrushed real people)in the advertisements on the sides. Facebook doesn't have a lot of that so he now has a facebook account instead. Wow, I mean, wow. I don't even notice those things (the ads), but then I did notice that the ads on MY myspace were mostly for university degrees and "mom" things but he, as a man, would get the ads targeted to him. I mean, a man in today's world totally avoiding all hints of porn, he is amazing. I didn't ask this of him either. He decided to do this. I'm sure he gets tempted by things and he is still a man of course, but to purposefully avoid things like this is wonderful to me. He really honors me with this.
He is an excellent daddy, too. Having overcome a dreadful childhood situation to become the man and father he is today is a testament in itself, but he goes above and beyond. He loves, cares for, fights for, and spends time with his children. We agreed to have more than 2 children early on, because I was one of only 2 and I thought it was pretty boring (even though it WASN'T) but he was the one to be absolutely thrilled when #4 was accidentally discovered and then came to me later about having #5. I thought he was crazy but then talking with friends who have broken hearts because their husbands don't want anymore kids, I realized what a treasure of a husband I have. Now another thing, is that I had to have 2 C-sections with the last 2 kids and that was a huge ordeal for me, so when we decided to go ahead with #5, I said then that's it, because I don't want to go through another surgery and he was totally supportive. He may have wanted or wants more kids, but he put my health/needs first. And he was wise to ask about #5 when he did, because right now, I will have 4 kids in school this year and only 1 at home, and it will only be a few months before the last one is out of diapers and he is portable and functional and if I had waited and have a BABY now I might have gone crazy. Watching the baby i watch is enough baby for me right now!
Ramon means "wise protector" and he is just that. I am so thankful for him and how he makes his decisions, not on a whim but he really puts thought into them and how it will effect the family. The Lord gave him his wisdom, too. He grew up being abused and tossed here and there and he had to rely on the Lord to protect him and give him wisdom and he has continued to do that. I know I do not fully appreciate all that he is today because I take for granted sometimes the fact that I was raised fairly normally and project that on to him, but whenever I stop to think of all that made him who he is, I am totally impressed.
We've gone through many things in our 14 years. Namely, we have moved 14 times. We bought our first house at 10 years of marriage and when we moved in here it was our 14th move in 10 years. Don't ask, because there is a story behind each one. One I will tell you about is (I think)the 8th place we lived in. We moved there because of the cheaper rent but the place was pretty run down. We knew the owners well and they let us paint and fix it up for lower rent. We moved in in April and by August they wanted us to move out. They just needed to use the house for other things. (Don't ask.) So we found a temporary place to live in September. Then in December the house we moved out of actually burned down. I know, totally God, inconvenient for us but totally God's hand. You know, I'm thinking about this and I probably complained about moving the whole time, but Ramon never once complained about that situation. I think he was disappointed because he wanted a dog but that was it. During all the things we have gone through, he has been my rock and along with THE ROCK (God) we have been able to succeed. And I say again, WE. Together.
One thing that is true about our marriage is that we are so much better together than apart on our own. That should be true of all marriages but in our case it is definitely true. We make better decisions, we deal with the kids better, we don't just "get by" when we are together in these matters.
I love Ramon more today than I did when we said "I do" 14 years ago, and in a way, that is such a corny line but if it were not true then we would not still be together. I mean what can a 21 year old really know about love and commitment when they are so "in love"? But now to be 35, to go through the things we've already gone through together, to experience the things we've experienced and STILL be in love and committed to each other? Now THAT is a God thing. THAT is real love. That is the kind of love that is pure. I am so thankful for that and for my husband Ramon.

Gabriel Burton

The Last of my kids is Gabriel Burton. And I mean last for sure of the kids coming from my body! My body has been pregnant for a total of 45 months and nursed a baby for 41 months that is 86 months, so for over 7 solid years my body has been given for my children. I think that that is enough. Especially since I had the last 2 (including Gabriel) by C-Section. 2 surgeries where I was a totally healthy individual and yet cut open. It made the recovery that much faster since I was healthy to begin with -- I NEVER want to have surgery if I'm sick-- but it was quite a lot to go through. I had a C-Section with Gabriel because I had one with Ezra and my midwife's practice do not do VBAC (if you don't know what that is, it's no big deal but the people who DO know what it is no explanation necessary!) I wanted the same doc's and midwives that I was used to and trusted to help bring in my last child into the world. So from the beginning I knew what would happen, this was after RAMON convinced me to have just one more. I'm so glad he did, because Gabriel is such a blessing! It is usually the wife wanting more kids, but it was the husband in our case who brought it up before we were totally out of the "baby stage" why not just one more? I think I asked if he was on something at the time, but I prayed about it and indeed just one more was what God wanted. It happened pretty quickly from there as well. I am so thankful that it was "easy" for me to get pregnant and sustain the pregnancy. I do not take that for granted at all. I see heartbreak after heartbreak in this area and I just have to say that each and every child is a total miracle and that no one is here except for the hand and grace of GOD Himself. Two more things I will add about when Gabriel first got to us, I had to schedule the C-Section for a Wednesday around 39 weeks or so (THAT was really nice, too because I never went through labor with Gabe, boy, am I thankful for that!!) anyway, 39 weeks was around my nephew's birthday and the last year's birthday party we missed because of Ramon needing to go to the ER for something, so I decided to schedule it for 40 weeks which the date was April 5, 2006 or 04/05/06 isn't that the coolest birthday in the year 2006?? I was so thankful for that and I was not worried in the least that I would make it to that day and that I would not have any labor and since everything was prepared I would have a quick recovery. All that happened as if I scripted it. But it wasn't me, it was the Lord answering my prayers. Thank you LORD! Another thing about that is after Gabriel was out and they were "putting me back together", they told me why the last 2 babies were breech (I would have never had them the regular way, it would have been probably very bad for me had we tried). The doctor and midwife said that my womb was heart shaped and the baby's head got "stuck" in one of the sides of the heart and then couldn't rotate anymore! Isn't that the coolest thing ever????? My womb shaped like a heart -- wow! Let me tell you again how great God is!!!!
Anyway, so now we have Gabriel "hero of God" and Burton "famous". Gabriel was suggested by my mom and meant something cool so that's where that name came from, and Burton was after Ramon's Grandfather, Duane Burton Bassett. I thought it was a very cool name for a middle name so I wanted to find a first name to go with it.
He is 2 years old at the time I write this and right now looking at me with his HUGE brown eyes! He is so cute with the huge dark brown eyes and then everything else, skin and hair are so LIGHT! He has such bright blond hair it is almost out of place with the other kids who are pretty similar. I used to look at him and say "where did you come from" since he is totally different (except you can see it in the eyes). He weighed 8 pounds 15 ounces, which isn't that bad (almost 9 pounds!), but my next biggest baby was 7 pounds 9 ounces, that is a whole pound and a half bigger! He also has spots. Yes, you read that right, he is spotted with this thing called "Erdicaria Pigmentosa" and it's supposed to make him more prone to allergies and be itchy, but none of that has happened -- thank the LORD! He takes a low dose of Singulair everyday, but that is nothing. The spots are supposed to go away when he is 5 or so, and not hurt him. So no big deal! They look a little strange to others who are not used to it, but soon they will be gone anyway. He is my little spirited one, too. He loves to explore and get into everything. He has the sweetest habit, though. He sucks his thumb but then with the other hand, rubs his ear -- OR the ear of the person closest to him! It's hilarious! If you are the lucky one to be near him, it feels so good. My mom says it's like a little massage! He is all boy but so very friendly and has a winning smile to boot. He is potty training now and it's been the easiest of all the rest. I am going to have a big party with the theme "I Don't Have To Buy Diapers Anymore!" after he is potty trained. Yes, I have been buying diapers now for 11 years, 2 months, and 10 days. I am so done with diapers. But on the other hand, I love the snuggles and ear rubs that come with the diapers so I am not wishing away this and missing out on the good, I am really just looking forward to my "diaper raise"! (Which is what all families get when you no longer have to buy $30 in diapers every month -- or more!)
Gabriel is a welcome addition to our family and even though we have 5, with him it seems even. We have 2 boys, then a girl, then 2 more boys. There is no perfect number of children to have (pudding comes in packs of 4 but juice in packs of 6 so who's the expert here?) you have to listen to your heart and to God for your perfect number. I would never tell anyone to have more kids just because they "only" have 2, that may be THEIR number. Who am I to say anything to them?? They can ask me what it is like with 5, I will be happy to tell them over dinner (their treat) with someone babysitting the kids. But 5 is not for everyone. 2 is not for everyone. 10 is not for everyone. I do chuckle a little when I hear someone complain about having problems with 2. One thing that is essential for every family is to have a mom and a dad who love each other and love the kids. You can go anywhere from there! If you don't have that, then until you get that you cannot move on to the next cool thing for your family! (For all you single parents out there, who are not single by choice but by the bad choices of others -- I salute you and you can do and overcome anything with this next step-->) The next step would be for everyone to love God together. If you have that the SKY IS THE LIMIT!
I will focus on my husband next, I am VERY thankful for him and it will be an honor to honor him especially this month, for on the 30th, we will be married for 14 years.