My Husband!

Now the time has come to tell you about my husband! His name is Ramon and as of July 30, 2008 we will be married for 14 years. I consider that an amazing gift in and of itself. How anyone could put up with me for that long......he deserves sainthood. Not that I'm all that bad, but I take everything out on him that I can't take out on anyone else. He gets me at the end of my rope most of the time. For that, I repent, he should get the best of me all the time. He deserves that. I am thankful that he's stuck with me through that.
What attracted me to him was his genuine-ness. (Besides the fact that he is TALL, DARK and HANDSOME!) He was not putting on aires for me, trying to impress me, etc.. in fact we were pretty much just friends for a long time. He was the same when he was around his guy friends as he was with me by ourselves, as he was with a group of people out in public. He had nothing to hide and nothing to lose by just being himself. He didn't let everyone in, though, and guarded his heart, but when we did declare our "love" for one another, that was it for both of us. He was all mine and I was all his. There was no one else for me. He was always open and honest and we shared everything.
Since he was/is so genuine, I trust him completely. I trust him so much that if someone were to come to me and say, "your husband made a pass at me" I would let them know that THEY need to repent for lying. I trust him, and he has proved himself over and over to be trustworthy. He has never violated that trust and often protects that trust vehemently by putting in place guards of protection. Like for instance, when we were youth pastors, he would never ride in a car alone with a teen girl, or be in a room alone with a teen girl and even today, if he takes a babysitter home, we always ask the girl's parent's permission before and then he has maybe only done that 2 or 3 times, ever.
This is something I do not take for granted. His life is an open book to me, I could look at his email if I wanted, I could read anything he gets in the mail and know that he is not doing something that he shouldn't do. Not that I have the need to do that, either. He even closed down his myspace because of the scantily clad cartoon ladies (and airbrushed real people)in the advertisements on the sides. Facebook doesn't have a lot of that so he now has a facebook account instead. Wow, I mean, wow. I don't even notice those things (the ads), but then I did notice that the ads on MY myspace were mostly for university degrees and "mom" things but he, as a man, would get the ads targeted to him. I mean, a man in today's world totally avoiding all hints of porn, he is amazing. I didn't ask this of him either. He decided to do this. I'm sure he gets tempted by things and he is still a man of course, but to purposefully avoid things like this is wonderful to me. He really honors me with this.
He is an excellent daddy, too. Having overcome a dreadful childhood situation to become the man and father he is today is a testament in itself, but he goes above and beyond. He loves, cares for, fights for, and spends time with his children. We agreed to have more than 2 children early on, because I was one of only 2 and I thought it was pretty boring (even though it WASN'T) but he was the one to be absolutely thrilled when #4 was accidentally discovered and then came to me later about having #5. I thought he was crazy but then talking with friends who have broken hearts because their husbands don't want anymore kids, I realized what a treasure of a husband I have. Now another thing, is that I had to have 2 C-sections with the last 2 kids and that was a huge ordeal for me, so when we decided to go ahead with #5, I said then that's it, because I don't want to go through another surgery and he was totally supportive. He may have wanted or wants more kids, but he put my health/needs first. And he was wise to ask about #5 when he did, because right now, I will have 4 kids in school this year and only 1 at home, and it will only be a few months before the last one is out of diapers and he is portable and functional and if I had waited and have a BABY now I might have gone crazy. Watching the baby i watch is enough baby for me right now!
Ramon means "wise protector" and he is just that. I am so thankful for him and how he makes his decisions, not on a whim but he really puts thought into them and how it will effect the family. The Lord gave him his wisdom, too. He grew up being abused and tossed here and there and he had to rely on the Lord to protect him and give him wisdom and he has continued to do that. I know I do not fully appreciate all that he is today because I take for granted sometimes the fact that I was raised fairly normally and project that on to him, but whenever I stop to think of all that made him who he is, I am totally impressed.
We've gone through many things in our 14 years. Namely, we have moved 14 times. We bought our first house at 10 years of marriage and when we moved in here it was our 14th move in 10 years. Don't ask, because there is a story behind each one. One I will tell you about is (I think)the 8th place we lived in. We moved there because of the cheaper rent but the place was pretty run down. We knew the owners well and they let us paint and fix it up for lower rent. We moved in in April and by August they wanted us to move out. They just needed to use the house for other things. (Don't ask.) So we found a temporary place to live in September. Then in December the house we moved out of actually burned down. I know, totally God, inconvenient for us but totally God's hand. You know, I'm thinking about this and I probably complained about moving the whole time, but Ramon never once complained about that situation. I think he was disappointed because he wanted a dog but that was it. During all the things we have gone through, he has been my rock and along with THE ROCK (God) we have been able to succeed. And I say again, WE. Together.
One thing that is true about our marriage is that we are so much better together than apart on our own. That should be true of all marriages but in our case it is definitely true. We make better decisions, we deal with the kids better, we don't just "get by" when we are together in these matters.
I love Ramon more today than I did when we said "I do" 14 years ago, and in a way, that is such a corny line but if it were not true then we would not still be together. I mean what can a 21 year old really know about love and commitment when they are so "in love"? But now to be 35, to go through the things we've already gone through together, to experience the things we've experienced and STILL be in love and committed to each other? Now THAT is a God thing. THAT is real love. That is the kind of love that is pure. I am so thankful for that and for my husband Ramon.