So much has happened!!

I'll write out the list:
1. Ramon's Birthday
2. My Birthday
3. Zoe had surgery to remove tonsills and adnoids
4. Me and Ramon were sent out of town
5. Zoe (with the childcare provider WHILE we away)threw up blood, was taken to the ED, and had to have another surgery to stop the bleeding from her wounds
6. She had to be out of school a total of 2.5 weeks
7. The Lord impressed a whole new way of thinking and acting on us.
8. My best friend announced terrible news.
9. I went out of town with our Pastor to a Women's Retreat for 3 days.
10. Daniel has started with counciling.
11. Gabriel had his second birthday.
12. I now have 4 jobs: full time babysitter with a 5 month old, I also work at my church, I am a consultant with All Squared Away organizing company, and now I also work midnights at Secure US as a nighttime monitor of systems. Along with house, husband and children.

I may get to touch on each of these things later, but for now, just know that I am thankful for each of them. They are getting me closer to my destiny than ever before! I have a purpose for my life and someday each of the battles that I have faced in my life will be necessary for me to grow into who I become. Then I will be a stronger and more capable person for what I've gone through. And then to GOD be the glory! Who else could have seen me through some of the toughest times? Who could have kept me steady while staring failure and defeat in the face? ONLY GOD! WOW, am I thankful! So, for now this is a list of all the victories just within the last month, boy, am I excited about what the next month brings!!
Go God!

My Birthday

I just had another birthday and it has caused me to reflect since I am "mid-thirties" now. To some, I am still a baby. To others I have some experience under my belt and being married for almost 14 years and having 5 kids makes me, in some people's minds, an experienced person. I am thankful for the people who think I am still a spring chicken, because I am. I think I've gotten a little smarter because I've learned about more stuff out there that I don't know anything about. But all in all, the more I think I'm on top of things, the more I realize there is so much more to know. I am thankful for the older women in my life who keep me straight and don't let me get a big head even though I may have more children than them for instance. I want to keep my perspective. I need that grounding. I am also thankful that I can offer something up to the younger women. The Lord has brought me so far and if I don't give back then I am not being a good steward of the Father's gifts.
Thank you, Father, for Birthdays. It makes me really thankful that I made it another year and I may have another year to grow.

I am thankful for the Lord guiding me.

So I have been watching the show called "Snapped" and it features women who have snapped and killed someone or attempted to kill someone. I know, I know, not the best thing to be watching and I digress it is not, but I have been thinking that I am not very much different than these women. They are regular women, some college educated, some not, some married some not, some have children some do not. Some are just like me, middle aged, homemakers married with children. But for whatever reason, their minds snapped and they, in a fit of rage, jealousy, anger, or craziness, killed someone. So what is the difference between them and me? I have been pondering that. I have felt things like that to make my blood boil so to speak. I have thought about things that are illegal to do. But the thing that separates me from them is the Lord. Plain and simple. I have the Lord to lean on. I have the Holy Spirit to guide me and take away the thoughts that creep in that should not be there. I have the Lord to hand over my problems to. I have the Lord who says "Vengence is mine I will repay". I do not have to worry about things that happen to me that I have no control over because the Lord is my defender. These other women allow themselves to think about dealing with a situation that is not theirs to handle, it should be the Lord's and they do not allow Him to defend them or comfort them or lead and guide them. I do. I WANT the Lord to guide me in all the ways He wants me to go. I am so thankful for that. It would be easy for me, without the Lord, to fall into this kind of trap. Of course I want revenge sometimes, but sometimes it is not for me to take myself, it is best left to when the LORD wants to defend me and take vengence for me on my behalf. And He will! I only have to relax in knowing that it is the best kind. I only need to trust in Him. Which I do!

I am thankful for my children!

Just a quick note, there is lots going on this week! I have been reading about a family who have 6 children and they ALL have Autism. Can you imagine 6 children and all of them with some form of Autism. Some are high functioning, but others like a 6 year old is still in diapers. It is an incredible story as they all were diagnosed in 2006 even the oldest was 11 or 12 when the diagnoses came. I can get frustrated with my kids, especially when I tell them things and they ignore it and mess things up. It really bothers me. But after reading about their story (there is a video to watch at abcnews.com, too) on this blog http://www.autismbitestheblog.blogspot.com/
I have to think twice about my kids. Tonight, my oldest has tons of homework, he missed yesterday and he has an oral report and a spelling test tomorrow. Well, he has taken it upon himself to fix everything in the house, from game systems to arguements between siblings, and doing everything BUT homework. This has been the better part of an hour. Now, he's telling me he can barely move his hand because he's been writing so much. I got really frustrated with him earlier and had to go to this blog and read about all the things they have to deal with and then go back to my Daniel and be ever more patient. Oh, because he has basketball tonight too, arrrrrggg. But, nothing is impossible with the living God. And on Him I have my trust, in all things. This day shall pass and be only a memory in a few days. God is here and God is there! What a marvelous thing.
Thank you Lord for the problems my kids have, for they could be much worse!!

Forgot to mention another bombshell...

I started this blog to tell about all the things I am thankful for right? I would list even not so great things and then say that I am thankful for SOMEthing about that. Then a couple days later, I learn that we have to sell our house and move. That was big enough but another bomb went off after I said I would be thankful for everything.........a puppy. Yes, I said puppy. The husband and children have been begging for a dog for as long as I can remember and I have just flat out said no. There are so many reasons, not the least of which is the fact that I, the SAHM, would have the majority of the responsibility and I do not desire more mouths to feed or things to do. I do enough already! So a couple days after Christmas we go to a home to "look" at dogs, OH excuse me, these are not trained animals or full grown, they are 7 week old PUPPIES. Living outside with all their brothers and sisters and mother. I am content to sit in the car while the kids and hubby are outside picking one out and falling in love. We are not bringing one home, I say, we will go and think about it and maybe come back. We stay there too long and it is inevitable. We take one cute little girl home. I get to name her so that maybe the bonding process will begin, she is named "Bailey". (When I had Daniel there was a little girl born the next day named Bailey and I have always liked that name, we couldn't use it because our last name begins with a "B" and it just doesn't sound nice with a "B" first name.) So now my life is turned upside down with more things to do, feed, train, train the kids to train the dog, all things I am not thankful for. Especially picking up poo, doggy poo. Poo in the diaper is tolerable, used to that. Even when the occasional poo ends up not in the diaper or potty, mommys are well equipped to clean up the mess. I am not happy about doggy poo. I am not happy about doggy pee. AND, did I mention, it is the middle of WINTER??? Yeah, like I am going to send out my 7 year old in 20 degree weather to take the dog out. I did that once and he came to the door, red cheeks and nose and all, and said "I can't take the cold". Awwww. So I go and the dog wants to play, remember she lived outside prior to coming to our house. I say, just go already, and be done, but her with her layer of fur, says "this is fun, I want to play with the sticks and mud". The hubby says that I don't have to take her out but once while the kids are at school and then they will do it after they get home and he will do it when he gets home. Yeah, right. THEN the hubby abandons me 2 weeks into this to go out of town on a business trip for 3 days. THANKS. Then this dog, we realize, is going to be BIG. She had a medium sized mother so it never occurred to me that she may be bigger than that. But she has grown about 2x in size since coming to us and that is the total OPPOSITE of the type of dog I wanted (one that would fit into a purse!). AND just to top it off my husband gets a HUGE bag of dog food claiming that she is "skin and bones" and we need to feed her more. WHAT?? Another thing is that I am now watching 2 babies and when the 2nd one came to my house to "interview" me, Bailey proceeds to not only pee right in the middle of the living room where we were right in front of us, but she does this horrible hacking throw-up sound and throws up! So much for good first impressions. So I have spent the better part of the month not in thankfulness because of this dog. I now have SOME things to be thankful for. One thing is that I don't have to vacuum as much food from under the table (some joker builder put CARPET in the dining area!). Another thing is that she is kind of cute with a floppy, gimpy ear. The ears either stick straight up or the both hang to the right. Yes, the left ear hangs over her head pointing to the right, it looks really funny, I'll have to get a pic and post it. More things to be thankful for because of the dog include: she did not prevent me from getting the babysitting job for the 2nd baby, apparently the family has a crazy puppy and has had more probs with theirs than we have had with ours and they totally understood the puppy stage. The first baby I had been watching, has dogs at their house only their dogs are HUGE and beautiful and totally trained, but they were happy to see a puppy when they came to drop off their child. Nobody has shown any allergies to the dog. Gabriel is supposed to be more prone to allergies and so far he has not been allergic to anything. That is God not fate, by the way! I am actually thankful that she was raised like she was before we got her. We have had dogs from the pound but those dogs are trained to "go" in their enclosures. Bailey was just outside and went outside to "go", so when we brought her to our house and use the crate, she has not "gone" in the crate! I am very thankful for the crate. Also, the kids have really stepped up to the plate concerning care of the dog, sometimes they have to be reminded that they asked for it and it is not a job for only when you "feel" like it. But for the most part, they are doing very well, mommy needs only to remind and keep track of who's "turn" it is to do things and if that is fair then they don't complain. I am thankful for the fact that she is a FEMALE dog. We needed more "girl power" in the house. My husband loves coming home to a happy dog. She is the first one to greet him, since she can run faster than the kids and knocks them down on her way, but STILL its cute and a happy time for the hubby. And for me, I realized that all I did at first was complain and whine. I also realized that something that is good for everyone in the family is good for me, too, even if it not MY desire. Bailey does not really come to me, probably because I am very stern with her since everyone else is so playful, that is not my job, my job is to keep her from chewing up our shoes and smelling up the house. But eventually she will learn that I am able to tolerate her and am thankful that the kids love her and for what she adds to our family.

The only girl: Zoe Claire

I am thankful that I had at least ONE girl! My life would be surrounded by testosterone if not for Zoe. She is a bright light.She is bouncy and bubbly and dancy and still very tough! My husband says she can hold her doll in one hand and slug her brothers with the other! I am thankful for that because she doesn't let anyone walk all over her. Now, she still uses her position and screams like crazy to get attention and often teases because she knows that the brothers are NOT allowed to put their hands on her, but she is testing her boundries and seeing what it's like to be in a male dominated world. I'm glad she's doing it here first and not out in the corporate world where women constantly "down size" themselves with a little tear and "sniff sniff" and a batting of the eyes. Zoe will learn that it takes hard work and not "feminine wiles" to get ahead the right way.
I am thankful she is a motivated student, she loves to read and do homework! She is the one with 5 books in her hand every night wanting to read all of them. She is the one that says, I dont' want any help, I want to do it by myself and learn it! I am thankful that she is good with her little brothers, she is a little mommy and helps them so nicely! I know she will be a great babysitter one day and eventually a mommy although right now she says she doesn't ever want to get married. I don't think that will be an issue later on being surrounded by boys, boys at home, best friend at school is a boy, a boy next door, 4 boys across the street, 5 boys just down the street, a lot of times she is the only girl riding around on her bike outside with all these boys in the neighborhood.
Now, let me say this, I am thankful that she is so "girly". She loves to play mommy as previously mentioned, she loves to play dress up (she can change clothes faster than anyone!),she loves her dolls, she loves make up. I'm so glad she has a nice balance in her life where she is exposed to boys but still loves being a girl. She is also in these wedding shows, she is the flower girl model! She gets to have her hair and make up done like she is in a wedding and then put on fabulous flower girl dresses and then walk the runway. WOW is she good and smiley and beautiful! She is 6 but wears a couple sizes smaller so she can do it all. She loves that time to dress up for real. I am thankful for that because it is FREE for me! And I can take all the pics I want!
I'm so glad I got to name her after my grandmothers. Claire is her middle name because of my Grandma Child, Clara and my Grandma O'Connor, Clarita. They are both with the Lord right now. I was their very first grandchild and I had the most time to spend with them. They were both at my wedding. I treasure the picture I have with them. I enjoyed learning to bake and learning to knit at their side. I was able to give one a couple great grandchildren before she passed on. I was able to spend weeks at ones house. They were fabulous women. I know that their prayers for me still carry on to this day and that one day I will see them both in heaven. I'm so thankful for the opportunity to carry on their names to my daughter. Not only is she Zoe meaning "LIFE" but she is Claire meaning "bright and clear". Now that's what I think is the making for a wonderful legacy to have and to carry on.
I am thankful most of all that Zoe's little life was spared. We decided on the name a few months before she was born and when you say a person's name you are speaking the meaning of that name to them everytime you say it so we called her "life" even months before she was born. Then the day came when she arrived all 7lbs, 4 ozs of her. I labored at home, they didn't want me to come in although I knew I was in labor, when I got there I was 9.5 cent. dilated so she came within a half hour. Full term, beautiful. Everyone around me told me to stay in the hospital another night (the customary 2 day stay) even though I was feeling pretty good. I had 2 boys at home age 4 and 15 months so ok, I'll stay. That night while I was sleeping and Zoe was in the nursery she, for no reason, stopped breathing. The nurse caught it and called the doc in and she did it again and was taken to the NICU. Thus began the most terrifying days of my life. But all the while we were calling her LIFE even before she got here. She was sent home on 2 monitors, for breathing and pulse-ox. The Lord spared her life, healed her and she is a very healthy 6 year old now. I can only thank the Lord every day and thank him for her name which spoke LIFE into her and still speaks life into her every day.

My Josiah!

I am also thankful for my second born son (I used to say #2 son but that never sat right with me) Josiah David. He is a breath of fresh air. He is a great observer and tells what's on his mind but only when he wants to. I am thankful that he is not like his older brother, I don't need 2 of one kind of kid and he is so different that I think how did these 2 boys come from the same parents?! (no doubt, they do!) He rarely throws a temper tantrum and when he does he is quite serious and something is seriously wrong in his life. I pay attention to his tantrums, because usually there has been a great injustice in his eyes and if he is THAT passionate about it then I need to take a few minutes and hear him out. Now, they are sometimes for little things, like little brother broke my soldiers (you know those little plastic green ones that come in a pack for $1). He had them all lined up ready for battle and while he was at school little brother came and stomped on them and most got broken. Yes, it is a tragedy for this boy, but when mommy explains that little brothers do that kind of thing and it is possible to get more, he dries his tears and moves on with his life. I LOVE THAT! He really does make the best of things and when he understands (or at least if things are explained in an appropriate way) he will accept that and not be upset for hours or act like it is the end of the world all the time. I am thankful that he does well in school. He writes letters backwards, but hey, in time that will correct itself. He is great with homework except for the initial No I don't want to do homework now thing, he is done in record time. His reading is improving weekly, the other day he read a story and by golly I was impressed. He doesn't really LIKE to read yet, he won't read a book for fun, except for the picture books and animal books. But again, that will come as he figures out that reading is actually fun. And I am SOOOOOOO thankful he is not a trouble maker at school. I really don't have to worry about if the teacher will call me to come get him, I don't have to worry about parent/teacher conferences. He likes to talk and tell me about OTHER kids and how they use the "f" word (in our family the f word is fart we don't use that word) and how other kids lie to the teacher and disobey. See? Very observant. I think he uses OPM to guide him. OPM would be Other People's Mistakes, he observes what other people do, mistakes they make and calculates the cost to himself and says that's not worth the trouble so he is rarely in "trouble"! God has given him a great gift in that! I also am thankful we were able to use one of my favorite names "Josiah", it means "the FIRE of the Lord" so cool, huh??? How can you go wrong when every time I call him his name I am calling him the fire of the Lord?! Awesome! I love names and the meaning of names.
Side note: Daniel's name means "God is my Authority"!!
Josiah in the Bible was 8 years old when he became king and he was a good king in spite of having bad kings ahead of him and behind him. Probably because of his mother! My speculation only I am not a Bible commentator!
I am thankful that he is so kind hearted towards animals, he lacks the skills to take care of them properly, but he is 7 and I can't count on him to remember everything. But he loves animals and is awed by the croc hunter and was so sad when he died. He said he was going to go work for that Zoo in Australia. I said great as long as I can visit you whenever I want! He wants to be a Vet, and a Monster Truck Driver. I said as long as it's in that order because I don't see any money in the 2nd one!! He is a good basketball player, stays focused on the game. In T-ball he was little, age 4-5, and he didn't pay very close attention, but basketball seems to be good for him, keep him focused and really on a "team". He is friends with everyone he meets. He says he likes a girl in his class and last week kissed her. This from a kid who doesn't like the kissing scene in any movie (even cartoons who kiss!). So I don't know what really happened and he was at least able to talk to me about it, so the communication is open and he is still a great boy that I am proud to call mine for a season. He is God's really and I can't take any credit to his easy going nature and more quiet personality. God made him that way and knew we needed him to be just like he is. I am so thankful to God for letting me have this time with him. He is such a neat person and can't wait to see all that God has stored up for him.